HANDLER, YOU DON'T HAVE FOREVER."
We'd been here before. One of my married-with-kid colleagues had asked for an
update on my social life.
"I'm in no rush," I shot back. "When the right
one comes along, I'll jump. But why rush into the wrong relationship and be
miserable the rest of my life?"
The conversation follows the same script every time. I can
mouth her lines between my own, just like with that Christmas movie I see every
year. Being happily married and an only child, she doesn't understand how I
can be single and happy.
Admittedly, I'm loving life right now--singlehood and all.
Among other commitments, I'm kept busy with an active young adult group at church.
There's no shortage of people and events in my life: Friday night get-togethers,
Sabbath young adult potlucks, spontaneous hikes after lunch, Saturday night
outings, volleyball, vespers, and camping trips. "Alone" comes by
choice.
Singlehood is flexibility and independence. I can make decisions
on the spot. Late-night game night? OK. Hang out with a female friend on Sunday?
Sure, we're just friends. Leave the dishes in the sink until the pickle slice
eats through the plate? Who's going to care?
But sometimes it's different. Sometimes I do want someone else
there--someone I can do all this with. Someone I can laugh late into the night
with. Someone I can play with. Someone I can grow spiritually with. It's at
these times that I remember what this union is all about; it's something that
neither lots of people nor personal freedom can replace. It's a relationship
God designed to teach us about Himself and His real love for us.
I can understand how Adam, after wandering around alone with
no other creation like him, would be excited to see woman. She was like him,
yet different. She had similar interests, and those of her own. They were companions.
They talked to God and about Him--together. They enjoyed His company, each other's
company. Adam's days would never be the same.
As for me, until God brings my Eve, I'll remain happily single.
_________________________
Chandler Riley is a graduate of Andrews University and currently works in
the Retirement Department in the North American Division of the Seventh-day
Adventist Church.